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11 Ways to Work RSVP Reminders

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Hosting any event can be stressful, but anxiety tends to go through the roof when you’re managing a bridal shower or a wedding. You’re dealing with more guests, catering, booking a venue, and a million other things. Getting the guest count down exactly is a priority.

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Most of us have seen how painstaking the process of deciding who to invite to a wedding or a bridal shower is. You go over your list, again and again, to make sure you’re not missing anyone who has to be there. You want it to be the perfect day.

It’s tough, though, when people fail to RSVP. Are they coming? Are they not? Who knows?

Following up can feel forced and you also don’t want there to be any negative feelings around the special event. Finding the right working for an RSVP reminder is a great way to get the responses you need and keep everyone’s spirits up.

Here are 11 ways to word your RSVP reminders to get your final headcount down.

Ask About the Plus One

A girl and boy drinking champagne with the bride and groom in the background.

A lot of single people have a hard time RSVPing to weddings. Typically, in a couple, there’s one partner who is on top of responding and managing the calendar. When someone’s single, it can slip their mind if it’s not one of their strong points.

If you’re trying to track down RSVPs from single people you invited, send them a follow-up to ask them if they’ve decided if they’re bringing someone and who they are coming with.

Meal Choices

If you’re catering a wedding, you perhaps are offering multiple meal options. These days, people have a lot of dietary restrictions, and good hosts will be conscious of that and do their best to accommodate.

Whether someone’s a vegetarian, gluten-free, or has some other meal preferences, following up on meal choices is a great way to remind people to RSVP.

You can make the meal choice reminder look like a standard communication that’s going out to everyone, so the people who haven’t RSVP’d won’t feel singled out.

You also won’t feel like you’re being needy or anything for asking.

Keep It Upbeat

A woman in orange long sleeve taking a call ang looking in the paper

If you’re sending out RSVP reminders to people who haven’t responded yet, avoid the temptation to be snarky or demanding and keep things upbeat and peppy in your reminder.

Try something like, “We’re so excited to see you at ____! Please let us know if you will be attending.” The tone is everything here, so go over it a few times to make sure there’s no guilt for people who haven’t responded.

A Gentle Reminder

People send out save the dates before wedding invitations, and more and more people are using reminders in between the invitation and the event to keep everyone on schedule.

People are so used to getting multiple reminders in their email for everything they’ve signed up for, so a reminder notice, whether digital or on paper, won’t be anything new.

All you have to do is put a little notice at the bottom for people who have not RSVP’d yet, and tell them that you would love to hear from them and give them a “must hear back by XX” date inside.

Give Them an Update

Colorful bands of reminder on the floor

Providing an update about your wedding planning will be a great way to word an RSVP reminder.

You can say something like, “We just went and checked out the venue at _____, and it’s such a beautiful and intimate space. We would like to finalize the guestlist for ______, so please let us know if you will be attending.” This way the people getting the reminder will feel a bit of the urgency but that they’re also part of the event at the same time.

RSVP Deadline

At some point, you’re going to have to cut the people who haven’t responded off. Do so politely by giving them a reminder with a cutoff date attached.

Again, keep the tone of the reminder positive and emphasize that you would love to have them there for your event. Still, be firm on the date. Use wording like “complete”, “finalize”, and “due date” to let them know that you’re serious.

The Direct Mail for Important Guests

You probably won’t care too much if a distant cousin or one of your parents’ work colleagues doesn’t RSVP. However, if it’s someone important, you want to know if they will be there or not.

Even though you may feel strange doing it, people don’t mind getting a call or a note from you asking point-blank if they’re coming.

They may have some excuse for why they haven’t RSVP’d, but who cares really? All that matters is that you get their response and you’ve communicated that you very much want them there.

Just wait until after the RSVP due date has passed before you start reaching out to people one person at a time.

Ask Them to Follow Your Social Media Accounts

Couple getting ready in bed while sharing a phone. Social media icons are on the side

These days, it’s normal for big events like a wedding to have their own social media accounts. You can create Facebook pages and Instagram profiles to keep everyone updated on announcements and planning progress.

A social media outreach email is a great way to solicit responses from people who still need to RSVP. Emphasize that you want them to join the social media groups, but then also place a gentle reminder for them to let you know if they’re planning to attend.

What’s great about social media accounts is that you can send out multiple reminders in the text of any of your posts.

Blame It on a Mail Mixup

If you’re sending out hundreds of invites, there is a good chance something will get lost in the mail. What if you’re waiting anxiously for RSVPs and the people never got the invites in the first place!

Even if they did get them, you can send a follow-up communication to make sure they got their invitation and politely request a response.

Make a Personal Connection

Two gilds talking to each other on their phones.

If you’re waiting to hear back from a high school friend or an old coworker, you can encourage them to respond by making some sort of personal connection between old friends.

Saying something like, “Hi Emily, I just heard from Susan Davis that she’ll be coming to ____! I remember how much fun we had together back in school, and hope you’ll be there to relive all of our old moments. Have you had a chance to decide whether you can make it?”

Give Them More Ways to Respond

RSVP reminders can also be about giving guests more ways to respond. Let’s face it, sometimes people are too lazy to check a box and stick something in the mail. If you still haven’t heard from some people, send out an email or a text message letting them know that they can reach you there.

If you want, include your phone number so they can call you to tell you if they’re coming. For some folks, it may just be about the ease of letting you know that they’ll be there.

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